Spare Me the Illuminati Crap

To the religious fanatic that is gravely deceived and in the business of filling others equal measure of yes, crap, this is for you.

Yes it is important to educate people about this culture or religion or whatever that is rampant in Hollywood and the American music industry because people need to know what they are buying into. Some of the concerns are legitimate since they are voiced by the celebrities themselves. Now when you start making 2hour DVDs labelled 666 with my name on it, draw triangles and eyes all over it, and talk about how all I do glorifies the devil, I will sue you for libel. Okay maybe I would think about doing so. We even have other religious leaders on this black list including T. D. Jakes. Surely.

My Class Six students have been asking me if some of the Kenyan celebrities, namely Jua Kali and Size 8 are Illuminati because a pastor at a camp they went to told them so.

I knew his guy was a quack when as I was telling one boy to pull up his pants because the gay in American prisons used to do so to show ‘availability’, one of the girls said they had been told the Illuminati do that. SPARE ME.

They were also told makeup causes skin cancer. Go conservative Christian!

So please. Spare me this ‘scary’ ridiculous stuff. Feels like a public witch-hunt. If leaders were busy feeding the flock with God’s word and emphasizing grace and the Holy Spirit among other major biblical principles, they would not have to be scaring young minds into obedience.

That is all.



Far Fallen


First time? Oh that first time I was angry. I am blessed with the ability to speak my mind, and not everyone appreciates this. But that first time it happened? I was speechless. More like too many thoughts were competing to make a living that I could not decide which one to voice. So I conceded defeat.

The second time, I went ape. Cursed like a drunken vulgar infidel. Oh how the words streamed out of my mouth, condemning the forces that be for bringing about this madness a second time. I had fallen down silently as a tree in the forest that no one knows fell, that first time. This time, I was not going down without a fight, or shout. Every tree and human knew that that day, I had fallen and not silently.

Then the third. I protested, but irrelevant things got my attention, like a new born baby’s fascination with a mosquito until it bites and they come to fear and detest it.

How about now?

I no longer know what I am talking about.

Really, it is no big deal

So far I just have a title.

At this point this feels like a composition with no starting sentence. I am tempted to start with the, ‘I don’t know what to write about…’ line but that has been overused and abuse. And just as my friend Ian shared on Facebook-

I like dreaming about writing. I like thinking about writing. I like reading about writing. I like talking about writing.
Sadly, none of that is writing.

Just copy pasting that part took me a while. This modem is just… Maybe it is Jesus vibes but it only gets full network when perched on my bible when I am using the laptop on my desk. But we all say ‘African net’,  and we have no Faiba here in Kahawa because that for now has been reserved for estates where the who-is-who live in Kenya…

It is that bad, I am talking about internet connection speeds.

But to move this along and before you give up on my sharing anything of substance, I am currently volunteering at a children’s home as a teacher, and that is going well, but only when I do not want to step on children’s faces (don’t ask me how) or speak in a firm ‘you can not seriously be in this class and not know what this is’ voice or scheming two subjects in each of the three classes I teach in for the entire term.

I want to introduce you to Jackline in Class Four. She is such a wise/smart ass and it is both admirable and irritating to the point that I am really considering caning her one of these not-so-fine days. I do not know where her guts hail from but she has a habit of over-correcting teachers. Yes she has a keen eye but I am very tempted to tell her  ‘oh shut up, you got half of your homework wrong kiddo’ as an ‘appropriate’ response in such embarrassing correction moments. But no. I have to show that Jesus resides in me.

Another thing I kind of like about Jackline is her diplomacy; I think that is why she has not yet been called to the staff room by the other three (male) teachers and I for a beat and stomp down. She will find a very polite way of telling you to mind your own business when you ask too many personal questions. She will say it with a wide smile and will leave you thinking that you are violating her rights. Amazing. I want to be like her when I grow up some more.

Interesting what you can learn from children…

So enough people are making a fuss about volunteering my time at the school (I am five weeks in) for no pay, giving up my weekdays, and any form of social life for those five days, but really, it is no big deal.

Yes people, that is what I wanted to write about all along.

Yes God will bless me, yes it is humble (?) and whatever else, and my dad is willing to finance anything I need (thus far he has helped buy exercise books and pens for one class and tomorrow I will be getting rulers), and that is all nice but it is getting awkward.

Really. It is no big deal. For once I want someone to say ‘cool.’ in response. I feel this as natural as saying sorry; it is the right thing to do.

That is all the rant I have for today 🙂








That was how much Judas took from the chief priests to deliver Jesus up to them. This was after spending time with Jesus throughout His entire ministry; seeing His great works and hearing the Truth.

Sure, that may have been a lot of money back in the day, but when I look at it as is, it is such a pitiful amount.

In my shock at this fact a thought was put in me, ‘You betray Me for much less than that…’ This was not to condemn me, no. This is an actual fact.

In what way do you betray Jesus?


You Saw Me

You saw me.

You pull me ever closer to you

not into an embrace; not yet,

but further up the path,

this path that I have chosen,

or you chose me for, I cannot tell.

You saw me.

You carry my suitcases,

most of which you throw over time,

some of which you let remain,

I love how you love me:

like a jealous lover you see no flaw.

You saw me.

You do not listen to them;

he said, she said, so what?

I am your chosen bride,

taking me ever closer to the banquet;

all for me you say?

You saw me.

I do not deserve this,

but I would be a fool to refuse.

You cover my wounds with ointment,

You cloth me in white fashion,

covering the shame that dots my heart.

You saw me.

I long for your embrace,

Your face I shall see,

and I will lay at your feet,

submitting my all to you:

My husband can only have a glimpse.

You saw me.


In me.

All of me.

You chose me.

This is not really what I wanted to say…

Life is a journey.

There are so many things I would love to rant about to this blog, or just MS Word or my diary but I am aware of the power that words have. Like the phrase ‘karma is a bitch’. Sure that is a curse word but my experiences in life have taught me to embrace it. Though I was asked a good question; have you ever seen karma wag its tail?

Classic example is someone likes you but you do not like them back then you end up falling for someone who does not like you back? Man, Adam Kiboi was right. As hilarious as that reality is… Post for another day. I would tag his blog but I am doing this on phone.

So as I sit here waiting for this bloody mosquito to approach me so I can spray it to death at 5am, I realize that there is a consequence to all that we do. Consequence can be positive or negative.

What makes this reality not a reality to us Christians is that all our consequences have been paid for by Christ. That is why as a sinner, no matter how much good you do you are still a sinner but in salvation, committing a sin does not make you a sinner, you remain the righteousness of God in Christ. In this regard I am delighted by this truth because there are things I have been doing, saying and thinking lately… Sigh.

I just sprayed at the mosquito. Hope it dies… As I gag *gets under covers*

But what I do know is we are saved from death- the ultimate reward for sin, but not necessary the earthly price of disobedience. If the Holy Spirit tells you (omg that insect is still alive) to do or not to do something and you do not listen, woe unto you. Though what was intended for bad will be turned for good, this does not exempt you from hurt or mess or whatever that comes from disobedience.

That is what I know to be true.

With that said I shall sleep annoyed that Adam actually did have something sensible to say… Just so you know he is a priest and his religion embraces Mother Nature as supreme.

Forgive any typos. It is 5:30 and I have not slept all night.


I hope he does not visit my blog…

I will fall gracelessly and loudly,

laugh along and mask my shame,

I will get up and do it all again, 

no because I love gravity

but because your feet I want to serve.

You will  not help me up, that is okay;

that would mean commitment.

So I will get up, like the big girl I am,

Dust off and remain close to you.

I am not stupid; by far the wisest.

You are the treasure I never knew existed

with your worth far too great to ignore.

Don’t hold me hand, hold my hand;

I do not care.

As long as you are in my space

as long as you do not move away,

I will be grateful.

For you, I will cage my heart in a glass jar,

wondering if I will yield it when you ask.

If you ask.